MOMent Shifts

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Valencia Newsome Posey

MOMent Shifts

Welcome to the

official blog page of

Valencia Newsome Posey

These aren’t just blogs. They’re wake-up calls for the woman who's been showing up for everyone but herself.

MOMent Shifts is where you come when you’re tired of carrying it all and calling it normal. It’s the space where your unraveling isn’t judged, it’s honored. From mirror moments to mindset resets (the real kind, not the fluffy kind), this is where you shift how you see yourself… so you can show up like you were always meant to.

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A calming image with a handwritten reminder to show kindness to yourself, featuring coffee and a pastry.

Stop the Self-Talk Spiral: How to Speak to Yourself with Kindness

February 19, 20253 min read
Vibrant blog header featuring the title: “Stop the Self-Talk Spiral: How to Speak to Yourself with Kindness.

How often do you find yourself saying things to yourself that you’d never say to someone else?

  • “You’re not doing enough.”

  • “You’re failing.”

  • “You’ll never get it right.”

We all have moments of self-doubt, but for so many moms, it’s more like a constant loop in the back of your mind. The world tells you to be perfect, and when you’re not, that inner critic tears you apart.

Here’s the thing: the way you speak to yourself matters. Those words you repeat in your head become your beliefs, and your beliefs shape your life.

What if you started speaking to yourself the way you’d encourage a friend? What if, instead of criticizing yourself, you chose kindness?

In this blog, we’ll unpack how to silence the inner critic, reframe your self-talk, and build affirmations that remind you of your worth.

"REMINDER: You deserve the same kindness you give to everyone else." - A cheerful message displayed on a colorful envelope graphic with a yellow background.

1. Catch the Critic in Action

Your inner critic doesn’t announce itself with a megaphone—it sneaks in quietly. It’s that voice that tells you, “You’re not doing enough,” when you’re already running on empty.

Start by paying attention to when these thoughts show up. Is it when you’re overwhelmed at work? When you see a mom on social media who seems to have it all together? When you’ve had a tough day with your kids?

The key is awareness. Write these moments down in a journal, along with the exact thought you had. For example:

  • “I’m failing because I couldn’t make dinner tonight.”

  • “I don’t deserve to rest because I didn’t finish everything on my list.”

By naming these thoughts, you’re taking the first step in taking away their power.

2. Challenge the Lies

Once you’ve identified the thoughts, it’s time to challenge them. Ask yourself:

  • “Is this thought true?”

  • “What evidence do I have to disprove it?”

  • “What would I say to my best friend if she said this about herself?”

For example:

  • Critic: “I’m failing as a mom because I missed that school event.”

  • Truth: “I’m not failing. I’m working hard to support my family, and missing one event doesn’t erase that.”

Challenging these thoughts doesn’t come naturally at first, but with practice, you’ll start to see how often your inner critic exaggerates.

3. Rewrite the Script

Here’s where the real work begins: rewriting those thoughts into something kinder and more empowering. Start with one negative thought per day and practice reframing it.

For example:

  • Critic: “I’m not doing enough.”

  • Truth: “I’m doing the best I can, and that’s more than enough.”

If you find yourself slipping back into old patterns, remind yourself: this is a process. Change doesn’t happen overnight, but every small step matters.

4. Create a Confidence-Boosting Mantra

Think of this as your personal pep talk. A mantra is a short, powerful phrase that reminds you of your worth. Here are a few examples:

  • “I am worthy of rest, joy, and love.”

  • “I am doing enough, just as I am.”

  • “I am more than my inner critic.”

Write it down, repeat it daily, and watch how your mindset shifts over time.

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Your inner voice has been shaping your life, but you have the power to rewrite it. Speak to yourself with the same kindness you’d show a friend.

Start with one thought today. Catch it, challenge it, and reframe it into something that builds you up instead of tearing you down.

Want more tools to transform your mindset? Join the Unstoppable Mom Community and learn how to silence self-doubt and build unshakable confidence.

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Valencia Newsome Posey

Valencia Posey is the founder and CEO of Unstoppable Mom, dedicated to helping women reclaim their time, energy, and joy while balancing personal growth and professional success. With a passion for empowering women to overcome burnout, Valencia shares actionable strategies for thriving in work-life balance, self-care, and living a life full of purpose. Her mission is to support women in realizing their worth and living fully, both at home and in their careers.

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Copyright 2025 . All rights reserved

Office: White Plains, Maryland

Copyright 2025 . All rights reserved